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Ever Watched Disney Lately?

Alternative Title: Does “Beauty and the Beast” Contain Any Logic?

*As any college-aged girl will tell you, usually in a high-pitched voice and an “OMG!”, its in our biological nature to like Disney in two movements. One when we are little and later when all we want is to be little. While Disney does burst at the seams with magic moments and morals, it does leave some questions unanswered….*

1. What is with Mrs. Pots’ favoritism? She literally has dozens of children and she just blatantly favoritizes Chip. Unjust much??


2. Why does Belle ask the Beast right after this huge magical segment when he’s lifted into the air and bursts into light if it was the Beast? DID YOU NOT JUST SEE THAT IMPRESSIVE DISPLAY OF MAGIC??

3. Why has Belle never asked the Beast what his name was? I find it just plain rude she only called him the Beast whilst they were falling in love. Oh surprise. His name was Adam. You would’ve known that Belle.

4. The peasants never realized that their king and queen just disappeared? And the hundreds of staff? No one ever asked any questions? This was the feudal system for goodness’ sake!


5. So. Many. Innuendos. Remember her?


6. I understand that Gaston is the villain, but what makes him so evil? In every Disney movie, the villain has evil motivation. If we’re going by how he was actually portrayed and not basic assumption, his fault is only that he is narcissistic and ignorant of mental health issues. I’ve always thought that somewhere deep inside Gaston, he actually cared for Belle. So his murder attempt was only out of ignorance (to be fair, HE WAS AN ACTUAL BEAST) and jealousy.


7. What exactly is the moral of the story? Because if it’s “don’t judge a book by its cover”, how did the Beast actually prove himself worthy of love? There’s two minutes of a song sequence of them throwing snowballs and him eating soup correctly. What’s this true love thing then? He was frankly terrifying in the beginning when he yells at her about the rose and I could never forgive him for scaring the bejeezus out of six-year-old me.

8. Belle’s genius idea was to teach the Beast how to read with Shakespeare. Belle, you were supposed to be the smart one. That’s not for beginners, hon.

Well this was fun tearing apart my childhood logic. Any suggestions for more?

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